by 
Auriol Hays
The article was orginally published at: Before I forget
Love ‚Ķdesire … sex‚Ķintimacy. We are all guilty of loving too much.. too little‚Ķor too late. Around every corner I hear whisperings of ‚Äúthe way things should be‚Äù when it comes to love and relationships. Lines are drawn in the sand‚Ķthis is the way you should act here and that is what you should do over there. And those who do cross lines are considered bitches/whores or worst yet liars. ‚ÄúNo, it is not possible to feel that.‚Äù ‚ÄúWhat you are feeling is wrong‚Ķ.inappropriate.‚Äù I have always thought that our ideas about love are at best limited and sometimes just down right silly.
People want their lives and relationships to be simple and easy. Hell, my life is littered with…“things that should not happen” and “how could I be so stupid”. I made peace with the idea that I would be pounced by the bizarre and unexpected a long time ago. Life on my side is never dull…So I do accept the idea that you could love two people with great intensity in two completely different ways….or the ability to love earnestly when it is never reciprocated…or the sheer joy that comes with loving recklessly. I embrace them and putting them to music is my final act..
I always thought that the greatest risk you take happens when you are too sure of what you are doing…Anyway I was reading Before I forget on the plane ride back to CT and was struck by a few words on page 43. The characters spoke of the darkness of love‚Ķand how by delving looking into it we learn more about ourselves and our capacity to love. In fact our ability to really love is what ultimately determined whether we are free or not. As I look back on all the utterly stupid acts I committed all in the name of love‚Ķat least I am assured that I can still love‚Ķ and that‚Äôs something I never want to forget.
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