the two things i will say on this chat with a friend

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they’ve been said this month already but they sum up this cycle of my life right ¬†now.

i know a lot of people see this post and glance over it because it’s not original cath writing, but the truth is i want you to read every word and realise i can’t even write properly right now. all i can do right now ¬†is resonate and attempt to make some sense of my mostly divine, definitely crazy, sometimes-sad-but-i-have-to-keep-smiling life.

orchid – anm

Me, and my helmet such an unconventional kid
All intense and kinetic, at best tolerated from afar
Not yet arrested, and by that I mean betrothed
though a start I am newly courted
I’ve just not been trusted with altars

I’m a sweet piece of work, well intentioned yet disturbed
wrongly labeled and underfed, treated like a rose as an orchid
My friends, as they weigh in, get understandably protective

They have a hard time being objective
So inside we cancel each other out

I’m a sweet piece of work, well intentioned and unloved
unlabeled and misunderstood, treated like a rose as an orchid

You’ve brought water to me, making sure my bloom rebounds
you know best of what my special care allows

So I’ve lived in my blind spot
thought myself usual when I’m not
and your garden is a nice spot
as long as it is brave and where you are

For this sweet piece of work, high maintenance and deserted
I’ve been different and deserving, treated like a rose as an orchid
Sweet piece of work, overwhelmed, unobserved
I’ve been bowed down to but so misread
treated like a rose as an orchid

Will and Grace, Episode 1, Scene XI

“Sweetie, remember in college, we saw that French film about a man and a woman that were perfect for one another, but they kept missing each other, and in the last scene, they meet on a plane, because that‚Äôs the way it was destined to be, remember? And you said, ‚ÄúThat‚Äôs going to be me.‚Äù Gracie, you‚Äôre just in the middle of your movie. Danny was a plot point, a nice, decent, postcoital-high-5-ing plot point. There‚Äôs still time, you know. Go get some Raisinets”